Review of Forty Beads: Brainstorming Married Sex
If you have any preconceived notions about the Forty Beads book or method, let ‘em go. Forty Beads author Carolyn Evans is hilarious. Intelligent. Fearless. Warm. Evans straight-up brings it in this book. I read this book from cover to cover in one sitting. Although it’s not about married sex for women over 50, the possibilities are endless! (Be sure to read our Q & A with author Carolyn Evans!)
The concept of Forty Beads sounded interesting, (how could it not?) and Carolyn Evans’ website was intriguing, but I wasn’t convinced there was any relevance to sex and marriage for women over 50. Or a topical interest to anyone other than a group of thirty-something girly-girls, for that matter. Surprise, surprise.
Evans jumps right in with a humorous analysis and observations (grounded in personal experience) showing how differently men and women approach sex in a relationship. With a keen sense of humor entirely devoid of snarky or resentful undertones, Evans makes it crystal clear that the key difference between men and women is that “men have to have sex to feel close, and conversely, a woman has to feel close to her husband to want to have sex with him”. Bingo.
With a full steam ahead approach, she points out thoughts, theories, and ideas we all know (but rarely voice) surrounding the constant disquiet that lies just under the surface of even the best marriages and relationships when it comes to sex. It’s easy to relate to and identify with the often frustrating tug of war that takes place constantly in a marriage. If you’ve ever shut your eyes and feigned sleep or practiced avoidance techniques like an experienced head of state, buy the book.
Leaving no stone unturned, Carolyn Evans even addresses the acknowledgment of our rights as equally participating partners in a relationship both physical and emotional. The Forty Beads Method is more than just a marriage help book, offering just that opportunity, in a fun, thoughtul, and purposful way. Just query “What Would Gloria Say?” in a proactive response to the inevitable questions of personal empowerment and forty little beads and a fun way to refocus on sex and marriage for women over 50 – or any age.